What do we need to be happy? What personal attributes can we develop which will guide us towards a more fulfilled, joyful life - one characterized by an abundance of what Robert Henri described as "more than ordinary moment[s] of existence"?
Over the last week I've enjoyed re-reading summaries of some of my favourite researching psychologists' work, which has reminded me of what I believe are "the Big Four" mental attributes required for well-being.
My thinking about this was initially prompted by Yair Amichai-Hamburger 's article (issue 2739 of New Scientist magazine, December 2009, page 28-29) which introduced me to the work of Edward Deci and Richard Ryan, who developed self-determination theory.
Deci, coming from an experimental psychology background, and Ryan, from the humanistic tradition, combined their research efforts and concluded that healthy, actualized human beings functioned with autonomy (the sense that our actions are self-determined), competence (the belief that we can be effective agents in our worlds) and relatedness (the desire, or rather I would say imperative, to feel close to other people). In his review, Amichai-Hamburger added a fourth dimension, critical thinking, and I whole-heartedly embrace this addition.
Deci (with Richard Flaste) summarized their findings to date in his 1995 book, "Why We Do What We Do: Understanding Self-Motivation" (Penguin, ISBN 978-0-14-025526-3), which is an accessible read and I believe has dated well. Deci's voice rings through - he sometimes finds himself "aghast" at the behaviour of a friend, and "thought it was a shame [an MBA graduate] hadn't learned the difference between the nominative and the objective". I sometimes found myself cringing at some of his personal opinions (does it really matter that an MBA graduate uses "me" where grammar dictates he should write "I"?) but this personal presence makes the book more readable.
Deci emphasizes that people in "one-up" relationships (parents, teachers, bosses, doctors) have a responsibility to those who are "one-down" to them (children, students, employees, patients) to promote healthy autonomy, competence and relatedness attributes through the manner in which they conduct themselves within those relationships. This brings me to the work of another of my favourite psychologists, Carol Dweck.
Dweck is interested in self-theories, or the way that people perceive themselves (or aspects of themselves). Her 2000 book "Self-Theories: Their Role in Motivation, Personality and Development" (Psychology Press, ISBN 978-1-84169-024-7) is another very engaging and accessible read - despite the somewhat daunting title!
Her research began by asking how students thought about intelligence,whether they saw it as an innate, unchanging quantity (what she terms an "entity view") or a malleable, adaptive quality ("incremental view"). Her detailed exploration of what these self-theories mean for individuals' motivation, development, success and failure is clearly laid out; her arguments are easy to follow, and illustrated through reference to numerous (and I do mean numerous!) studies, which she summarizes with a light but accurate hand. She emphasizes the role teachers and parents (and, I propose by extension, all those in "one-up" relationships to others) play in moulding the self-theories children hold. In particular, she emphasizes the importance of what "one-up"s praise, and how they deliver that praise; for example, effort- and strategy-related praise is far more beneficial than person- or intelligence-praise.
OK, I've tried to summarize the life work of three researchers in a few paragraphs, and hope that if they read what I've written they wouldn't feel too mis-represented! What have I taken from all this reading and thinking?
Firstly, I am keenly aware that I am in "one-up" relationships with various others in my life. This is most clearly seen in my role as educator, tutor and mentor to people younger than me, but there are moments when I will - however briefly - adopt a "one-up" position in relationship to various others, as each day unfolds. I choose to believe I can adopt ever more helpful strategies in my relationships with others to support them in developing autonomy, competence, relatedness, the faculty for critical thinking and a healthy set of self-theories. I do this through the manner in which I interact with people and, most particularly, through the language I adopt when speaking with others.
Secondly, if I find myself feeling negative or low, I can use critical thinking to pinpoint which of "the Big Four" is lacking in my present circumstance and cultivate a mastery attitude to the situation (as opposed to a helpless attitude - thank you to Dweck for these evocative terms).
I love how these researchers' work - built up from very simple laboratory experiments over long periods of time - are now summarized for us in accessible form, and how they can equip us for living lives characterized by joy ... as well as enabling others along the same path.
PS: I think I'll write a bit more about each of "the Big Four" over the next little while ... depending on how the mood takes me! So keep posted, should this interest you.
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