Reading is one of my favourite ways to relax, and one "well-being measure" I use is to keep an eye on how much leisure reading I'm getting done. A fortnight ago, I noticed I'd spent over ten days getting through a paperback - a definite sign that life was, once again, out of balance, and some more "me time" was needed!
So over the last week or so I've re-read Patricia Brigg's Mercedes Thompson books. I love her urban fantasy, especially these novels featuring a history-graduate mechanic - who also happens to be a shape-shifting coyote, holding her own amidst werewolves, vampires and the fae. These stories resonate with my feminist beliefs and my fondness for seeing the underdog triumph. Having survived some environments charged with dominance "games" and witnessed the struggle for individuals to gain power, not lose power, and avoid subjugation, I read her close observations of dominance issues with delight.
Tonight, however, I found it difficult to take off my Patricia-Briggs-reading-lenses while my husband and I were watching TV. It seemed strange at first to be watching a contemporary Aussie drama through the "paranormal spectacles" - watching with a werewolf's keen eye for body language, eye contact and verbal tone - but thinking of that storyline in terms of dominance and submission did give me a whole new appreciation of the show.
Extrapolating out from this vignette, I'm reminded of how aspects of the interactions we have in one sphere of our life can seep into other arenas. We're all familiar with the easy trap of bringing one's work frustrations home with us, but how about the less obvious ones? A forgotten memory sparking us to anger or sadness, a sudden joy, an inexplicable change of mood ...
A similar question has been occupying my mind lately. We all know that some conversations, some interactions, have particular potency in our lives. Most of us will remember conversations which have had a very profound effect on us. If some interpersonal interactions are particularly potent, is it only these ones which have the capacity to change us ... or could it be that we altered, however lightly, by all the other lives we 'touch'? Is there a particular quality to some interactions which others lack, or do some conversations have more of that potent "something" which others also have, to a lesser degree?
I don't know. Food for thought.
Sunday, 4 December 2011
Tuesday, 29 November 2011
Some things stay the same
In my "practice" of running (as Buddhists might say) it's comforting to find that some things remain constant:
- I do some of my best thinking when I'm running
- I still hate sprint intervals (though I'm far better at them than I used to be - which isn't saying much!)
- Consistency in training = good. Inconsistency = not good
- I love running, but even so, sometimes it's difficult to get out the door and get started
- Stretching is wonderful, and ought not be skimped upon
- Running continues to teach me so much about myself, and about life.
Monday, 14 November 2011
A flash of Helsinki
Last Wednesday, I was in a bus, in downtown Dandenong. I was on my way to hospital for some surgery (but that's another story). I looked up from my book and glanced out the window. Framed by the bus, the cloud-roofed sky, the hard grey pavement and a slash of asphalt was a corner of Dandenong Town Hall/Drum Theatre.
I had a flash of dislocation: "I'm in Helsinki!"
It passed quickly; very quickly - the odour of bus, the screech as a young mother slapped her child, my anxiety at the prospect of being anaesthetised and cut ... and the certain knowledge that Dandenong is a long, long way from Helsinki. (Melbourne readers may know what I mean.)
I've only been to Helsinki once, twelve years ago. I was there for a conference, a pit-stop in the middle of a longer holiday, and had caught a cold - so was in my motel room when not at the conference, meaning I did not see as much of the city as I'd have liked. This is the first time I've ever 'felt' myself back there, and perhaps of all the cities I've visited, I would not expect Helsinki to be one to which I'd return in this manner. However, I would very much like to visit that city again - in the flesh this time! - and in flesh which was not to be invaded by a surgeon's blade!
I wonder what hidden inner desires this experience of "being" arose from? Something to ponder as I traverse Melbourne's highways and byways today, between appointments.
I had a flash of dislocation: "I'm in Helsinki!"
It passed quickly; very quickly - the odour of bus, the screech as a young mother slapped her child, my anxiety at the prospect of being anaesthetised and cut ... and the certain knowledge that Dandenong is a long, long way from Helsinki. (Melbourne readers may know what I mean.)
I've only been to Helsinki once, twelve years ago. I was there for a conference, a pit-stop in the middle of a longer holiday, and had caught a cold - so was in my motel room when not at the conference, meaning I did not see as much of the city as I'd have liked. This is the first time I've ever 'felt' myself back there, and perhaps of all the cities I've visited, I would not expect Helsinki to be one to which I'd return in this manner. However, I would very much like to visit that city again - in the flesh this time! - and in flesh which was not to be invaded by a surgeon's blade!
I wonder what hidden inner desires this experience of "being" arose from? Something to ponder as I traverse Melbourne's highways and byways today, between appointments.
Monday, 7 November 2011
Monday morning musing from an (apparent?) hippy
I can just tell that any efforts I make to organize this week are doomed to ... re-organization*, by forces beyond my control.
Already (and it is only 11am on Monday morning!) I have spent far longer than I intended in traffic, had my schedule re-arranged through appointment cancellations and rescheduling, and - amusingly - been "bullied and harrassed" for over an hour by one of my students, who has formed a fixed idea that I am a hippy.
This last amused me very much. This student's medical condition makes speech difficult; it is quite funny, being teased mercilessly while you are attempting to translate the sounds into words ... which denigrate you!
Perhaps the funniest thing about this interaction was that any objections I offered were firmly refuted. It made me wonder: am I a hippy?
How does one define "hippiness"? For this student, the fact that I love trees, was writing with a green pen, have one fingernail painted (green), was carrying a patchwork handbag and "wearing wool" (it was actually wool blend, but never mind) were all evidence enough. Further close questioning on his part uncovered my vegetarianism, the colour of my car (green) and the fact that I like cooking - all damning confirmations in his eyes.
I suspect most of us in Gen X would have a different definition of what a hippy is.
And really, do I care? Why does the thought of being labelled a hippy cause me to wince? Those qualities I associate with hippiness - care for the earth, pacifism, open-mindedness, compassion - are all qualities I aspire to, in various ways.
Anyway, as my unpredictable week unfolds, including day surgery "sometime" on Wednesday and its associated concerns, I hope I can carry my open-mindedness and compassion along with me ... even if this does mean adopting, albeit partially, the mantle of "hippy".
* I won't say "failure"
Already (and it is only 11am on Monday morning!) I have spent far longer than I intended in traffic, had my schedule re-arranged through appointment cancellations and rescheduling, and - amusingly - been "bullied and harrassed" for over an hour by one of my students, who has formed a fixed idea that I am a hippy.
This last amused me very much. This student's medical condition makes speech difficult; it is quite funny, being teased mercilessly while you are attempting to translate the sounds into words ... which denigrate you!
Perhaps the funniest thing about this interaction was that any objections I offered were firmly refuted. It made me wonder: am I a hippy?
How does one define "hippiness"? For this student, the fact that I love trees, was writing with a green pen, have one fingernail painted (green), was carrying a patchwork handbag and "wearing wool" (it was actually wool blend, but never mind) were all evidence enough. Further close questioning on his part uncovered my vegetarianism, the colour of my car (green) and the fact that I like cooking - all damning confirmations in his eyes.
I suspect most of us in Gen X would have a different definition of what a hippy is.
And really, do I care? Why does the thought of being labelled a hippy cause me to wince? Those qualities I associate with hippiness - care for the earth, pacifism, open-mindedness, compassion - are all qualities I aspire to, in various ways.
Anyway, as my unpredictable week unfolds, including day surgery "sometime" on Wednesday and its associated concerns, I hope I can carry my open-mindedness and compassion along with me ... even if this does mean adopting, albeit partially, the mantle of "hippy".
* I won't say "failure"
Saturday, 22 October 2011
Rhythms of Being and Doing
One of my very good friends is in a "being" phase of her life right now, in which she is concentrating on living in the moment and practising mindfulness (my words, not hers).
I, on the other hand, am very much in a "doing" phase of life. I am practising mindfulness - but the practice is highlighting certain imbalances which need redressing!
What am I so busy "doing"? Well, work is flat out: I have taken on a part time job, which is accounting for some hours each week, and my business is running almost at capacity. Which is all fantastic! But, being a recent change, is one I haven't quite adjusted to yet.
What I would like to see over the next two weeks is a return to balance, with more of my time spent:
We'll see how it goes .....
I, on the other hand, am very much in a "doing" phase of life. I am practising mindfulness - but the practice is highlighting certain imbalances which need redressing!
What am I so busy "doing"? Well, work is flat out: I have taken on a part time job, which is accounting for some hours each week, and my business is running almost at capacity. Which is all fantastic! But, being a recent change, is one I haven't quite adjusted to yet.
What I would like to see over the next two weeks is a return to balance, with more of my time spent:
- forward planning - I always have one or two 'aspirational goals' on the go, and these have been neglected in the busy-ness of lately
- doing the things I love (sewing, running) - as well as the things I love having to do (work, banking, accounting)
- and - in particular - catching up on my reading.
We'll see how it goes .....
Tuesday, 11 October 2011
Being Around Wonderful People
This evening I'm basking in the afterglow of a day spent with wonderful people. I just love being with positive, energetic, amazing human beings - and there are a few of them about!
Whether it's having someone truly listen to you, and take the time to hear your story; whether it's the energy you get from teaching a receptive student, who appreciates the opportunity to learn, and is open to the exciting beauty of knew knowledge; or whether it's returning home to the steady rock in your life - all these are wonderful things.
There's something alchemical about the process of speaking and being heard. (This, of course, is why therapy works.)
There's also something unmistakable and irreplaceable about that feeling of being fully alive, of being energized and motivated and creative, that you experience after spending time with someone positive, open, creative and ... well, just plain fantastic.
So, to all you wonderful people in my life - near and far, "real" and "virtual", "old" and "new" - thank you for gracing me with your presence - it is appreciated.
Whether it's having someone truly listen to you, and take the time to hear your story; whether it's the energy you get from teaching a receptive student, who appreciates the opportunity to learn, and is open to the exciting beauty of knew knowledge; or whether it's returning home to the steady rock in your life - all these are wonderful things.
There's something alchemical about the process of speaking and being heard. (This, of course, is why therapy works.)
There's also something unmistakable and irreplaceable about that feeling of being fully alive, of being energized and motivated and creative, that you experience after spending time with someone positive, open, creative and ... well, just plain fantastic.
So, to all you wonderful people in my life - near and far, "real" and "virtual", "old" and "new" - thank you for gracing me with your presence - it is appreciated.
Monday, 10 October 2011
New Runners! and a quick stocktake of the important objects in my life
It's that time of year again - new runners! Yippee!
It's such a treat to step out in beautiful, cushioned, supportive footwear that isn't tired and run down (ha ha). Actually, this pair isn't what I'd call 'beautiful' - this avatar of the line I use has gone with hot pink trim and laces; a little loud for me. However, the glorious new-shoe running-on-air feeling is indeed beautiful.
It makes me wonder: are there any other things in my life which could do with a freshening up?
My poor diary is feeling tired and run down, tatty around the edges, thick with inserted papers and staggering under the weight of pencilled appointments, sometimes erased and written over more than once; but opting for a new diary at this time of year wouldn't be easy. I think she's with me 'til the bitter end.
The debate about whether to re-dye my red tie handbag continues. I quite like the sun-bleached look, especially as it highlights the large gathered rose feature, but as I generally try to pair it with bold reds, it doesn't match so well any more. The question is: would the dye take evenly across the cloth? I'm not sure. I think I love it too much to tempt fate.
My wonderful phone is perfect just the way it is. Ditto laptop, my most prized possession.
The large black bag which doubles as laptop carrier and occasional satchel was re-stitched recently, where one corner had started to fray, so it's fine for now. Actually, come to think of it, perhaps the leather could do with some nourishing - might get out the shoe polish and give it a careful once-over.
The burnies (those homemade CDs I keep in the car, because my chocolate-endowing player tends to chew them as well as dirty them) need re-doing. Reckon it could possibly be a Tchaikovsky or Beethoven day tomorrow! Many hours in Melbourne traffic coming up ...
So: minor tweaking; nothing major needed. Certainly nothing that will give me the joy my brand new runners do, as I fly along the pavement. Woo hoo!
It's such a treat to step out in beautiful, cushioned, supportive footwear that isn't tired and run down (ha ha). Actually, this pair isn't what I'd call 'beautiful' - this avatar of the line I use has gone with hot pink trim and laces; a little loud for me. However, the glorious new-shoe running-on-air feeling is indeed beautiful.
It makes me wonder: are there any other things in my life which could do with a freshening up?
My poor diary is feeling tired and run down, tatty around the edges, thick with inserted papers and staggering under the weight of pencilled appointments, sometimes erased and written over more than once; but opting for a new diary at this time of year wouldn't be easy. I think she's with me 'til the bitter end.
The debate about whether to re-dye my red tie handbag continues. I quite like the sun-bleached look, especially as it highlights the large gathered rose feature, but as I generally try to pair it with bold reds, it doesn't match so well any more. The question is: would the dye take evenly across the cloth? I'm not sure. I think I love it too much to tempt fate.
My wonderful phone is perfect just the way it is. Ditto laptop, my most prized possession.
The large black bag which doubles as laptop carrier and occasional satchel was re-stitched recently, where one corner had started to fray, so it's fine for now. Actually, come to think of it, perhaps the leather could do with some nourishing - might get out the shoe polish and give it a careful once-over.
The burnies (those homemade CDs I keep in the car, because my chocolate-endowing player tends to chew them as well as dirty them) need re-doing. Reckon it could possibly be a Tchaikovsky or Beethoven day tomorrow! Many hours in Melbourne traffic coming up ...
So: minor tweaking; nothing major needed. Certainly nothing that will give me the joy my brand new runners do, as I fly along the pavement. Woo hoo!
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